


Inevitable

by westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist



Category: The West Wing
Genre: Episode: s04e23 25, F/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-09-09
Updated: 2011-09-09
Packaged: 2019-05-30 13:34:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,170
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15097721
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist/pseuds/westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist
Summary: "I wouldn't stop for red lights." "Those stories would make me like you." "You look amazing." "You have to get Josh."  It was all leading up to this. It was inevitable. Just a little wish fulfillment for Season 5. Post-ep forCommencementandTwenty-Five.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A copy of this work was once archived at National Library, a part of the [ West Wing Fanfiction Central](https://fanlore.org/wiki/West_Wing_Fanfiction_Central), a West Wing fanfiction archive. More information about the Open Doors approved archive move can be found in the [announcement post](http://archiveofourown.org/admin_posts/8325).

  
Author's notes: Author's Note: Aaron Sorkin played a cruel, cruel joke on us when he gave us the line "Are you in love with Josh?" and then left the show with no follow-up. John Wells was crazy not to pick up that ball and run with it. Mr. Sorkin always said that The West Wing was about wish-fulfillment, so here's a little bit of wish-fulfillment for Season 5.

Disclaimer: I don't own the characters. I just found them where Aaron Sorkin left them.  


* * *

“Are you in love with Josh?”  
The question hung in the air for several seconds. I froze, staring at my date book. Suddenly, it was as if a veil had been lifted, and I knew the answer. I had never acknowledged it before; never put it into words. It was just a reality I lived with, but never gave voice to. I simply went about my routine—fetching Josh’s dry cleaning and not fetching his coffee— with an ache in my heart. Suddenly, the ache had a name. I was in love with Josh. The realization took my breath away.  
It was so obvious to me now. I wondered if I was so transparent to everybody else. I had been in love with Josh since Rosslyn, maybe even before. He was the one I wanted to share good news with, and the one I wanted to comfort me in tragedy. He was the reason none of my other relationships ever worked out. I always held a small part of myself back; the part that was reserved for Josh alone.  
Before I could formulate a proper response to Amy, the silence of the West Wing was interrupted by half a dozen secret service agents rushing down the hall. Amy stood in surprise.   
“What’s going on?” she asked.  
I shook my head. I was relieved not to be under Amy’s scrutiny anymore, but I’d worked in the west wing long enough to know that something was not right. “I don’t know, but I think we’re going to have to put the Wellingtons on a back burner.”

********  
We soon found out from the Secret Service that Zoey had been kidnapped. Amy went back to the First Lady’s office to offer what help she could, and I snapped into crisis mode. While I watched CJ’s press conference on the televisions in the bullpen, I manned the fax machine and took Josh’s messages for him. I tried to reach him on his cell, but couldn’t get a hold of him.  
A while later, he finally returned with Charlie, who went straight to the Residence. Josh looked tired and more worried than I’d seen him in a long time.  
I knew I shouldn’t have been so hard on him about the faxes. He loved Zoey like a sister. They had formed a special bond on the campaign trail, and Josh had always felt a little responsible for her and for Charlie. But I couldn’t help but snark at him. “Bus station skanks.”  
I was angry at Amy for being right, angry with myself for falling in love with Josh and for being so transparent about it, and angry with Josh for making me fall in love with him in the first place. So, in the middle of a national crisis I had to read half a dozen faxes from his stupid, adoring fans offering him physical comfort in his time of need. It was disgusting. He was right when he said he didn’t write them. He didn’t ask for any of it, and it wasn’t his fault. Still, I took all of my feelings out on him, because what I didn’t want to acknowledge was that I wanted to be a comfort to him. That was my job, and it had been since Rosslyn— no, since his dad died on the campaign. I wanted to help him, but in light of my recent revelation, I didn’t know how. So, I snarked.   
Then I found the picture.  
“This is one tank top on top of another tank top. This is a Polaroid of Zoey.” I had to place my hand on Josh’s arm to keep from falling over, and his hand immediately went to the small of my back to support me.  
“Oh my god,” he whispered. Before he rushed off to hand the fax over to the Secret Service, his eyes met mine. “Well you be around?” he asked.  
I met his gaze and nodded. “I’ll be here.” We were still a team.

********  
I spent the next couple of hours trying to track down various senators and congressmen for Josh. Then I heard some commotion down the hall. I looked up to see CJ and Amy trailing after Dr. Bartlet as she made her way to the press room. I got up from my desk to see if I could help, but all I could was watch in horror as Mrs. Bartlet opened the door to the press room. It was hard to see a woman who I so admired look so broken. It was hard to hate Amy at that moment too.

********  
About an hour later, CJ, Will, and Josh were all in Josh’s office with the door closed, but I had a pretty good idea what they were talking about. No one was asking my opinion, but I didn’t have one anyway. I couldn’t imagine what I would do if I was in President Bartlet’s shoes, but if he was even half as distraught as the First Lady, I didn’t know how he could be expected to remain in office. Margaret called to say that Leo wanted to talk to all of them.  
I rapped on the door, and waited for Josh to say, “Come in.”  
“Leo wants to see all of you. He’s on the portico.”  
Josh, CJ, and Will exchanged a knowing look, and got up to leave. “This is it,” Josh said. “Page Toby, would you?” I touched his arm, stopping him just inside the doorway. Maybe he sensed my worry, or maybe he just needed some reassurance of his own, because he signaled to CJ that he would catch up. He looked at me intensely. “Everything’s going to be fine, Donna,” he tried to reassure me.  
“Is it?”  
He sighed, and looked down at the floor, then back up at me. “No.” I could see how conflicted he was, how much this hurt him. “Nothing is ever going to be the same again.” Then, just like that, he snapped back into political mode. “Page Toby?” And then he left. I stood there for a moment, watching him go, hoping that he was wrong. And then I went to the phone and paged Toby at the hospital.

********  
I was waiting for Josh when he got back to his office several hours later. He looked more discouraged and tired than ever. “How’d it go?” I asked.  
“We have a new president,” he said, rounding his desk, and sinking wearily into his chair. “It’s late. You should go home and get some sleep.”  
I ignored him, and sat down in one of his visitor’s chairs. “I brought you coffee and a bagel. The bagel’s probably stale, but you should eat something.”  
“You brought me coffee? Things must be worse than I thought,” Josh tried to joke, but it fell flat because it was the truth. Things were worse than we ever imagined they could get.  
“Just say thank you, and don’t expect this to become a regular occurrence.” I clung to the banter like it was a life raft.  
“Thanks,” Josh said sincerely. He began shuffling through his desk drawers, looking for something.  
“Bottom drawer on the right side,” I said. He pulled a half-empty bag of Lifesavers candies out of his desk. “They’re doing a press conference?”  
“Yeah, in about half an hour.” He popped a candy into his mouth.  
“And how are you doing?” I asked, studying him carefully, and wondering if I should call Stanley Keyworth. I knew that if I brought it up, Josh would tell me not to, like the not shots were fired outside the press room. I’d called him that night anyway. I probably would again.   
“I’m fine,” he replied dismissively. That was predictable.  
“Josh, this is me you’re talking to,” I said emphatically. I was trying to be there for him like I hadn’t been when he got back from the club. I was desperate to know how her was feeling, and what he was thinking. Not only because I loved him, but also because it would help me to know how to feel.  
He sighed. “I just keep playing it over and over in my head, you know? What if we had left the arboretum fifteen minutes earlier or later? What if Charlie and I had followed her into the club? What if—”  
“Oh Josh, there was nothing you could have done,” I interrupted him. “The kidnappers were going to take Zoey and they weren’t going to let anything or anyone stop them. I think Molly O’Connor is proof of that. If you had gone into the club, you might be…” I couldn’t finish that sentence. It was too terrible to consider. I had nearly lost him once before and now we were in the middle of a tragedy once again. When would it stop, I wondered.  
“Yeah,” Josh said flatly. “But just now—in the Oval, I seriously thought about resigning. Just for a minute. All I can think about are the political ramifications.” He looked down at his mug, and his voice was as bitter as the coffee we were drinking. “Zoey is missing. We’re in the middle of a national crisis, and all I can think about is how much I don’t want to work for Glen Alan Walken. God, I’m so selfish.”  
My heart hurt for him. Zoey was like his baby sister, and like I had told Amy before, Josh was always worried that something bad was going to happen to the people he cared about, and he had the worst guilt complex I’d ever seen. Naturally, he would find a way to blame himself. But he was also a politician, first and foremost, and always would be. Bartlet’s Bulldog, the fierce political operative was the only thing most people could see. But, I could see the war going on inside of him.   
“It’s not selfish, Josh,” I said softly. “It’s understandable. You’re very loyal; loyal to President Bartlet, and loyal to your party. It’s one of the things I lo—” I caught myself just in time. Now that I had acknowledged it, it just seemed to slip right off my tongue. “It’s one of your best qualities,” I amended. “I know you’ll find Zoey, and I know you’ll find a solution to all of the political problems. I have faith in you.”  
Will knocked on the open door. “CJ needs us.”  
Josh nodded. “Ok, I’ll be right there.” He turned to me on his way out the door, and said simply, “Thanks.”  
“Any time,” I replied with a sad smile.

********  
Thirty minutes later, I joined Josh in the back of the press briefing room to watch the press conference. “He looks small,” Josh murmured, staring at President Bartlet beside Speaker—President Walken at the podium. I nodded my agreement, but didn’t voice it. Jed Bartlet had always been an imposing figure in my imagination, someone I respected, and admired, and supported unconditionally. It was disturbing to see this man who I so admired, who I thought was invincible looking so defeated. I wasn’t sure if I was thinking about President Bartlet or Josh.  
Josh reached down and took my left hand in his right, threading our fingers together. I squeezed lightly, and he gave me a sad smile. It was a small gesture of mutual support. We both needed reassurance in that moment that there was something constant in our lives when everything else we thought we knew felt like it was crumbling. 

To be continued…


	2. Chapter 2

Inevitable

Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I don't own The West Wing or the characters. I just found them where Aaron Sorkin left them.

A couple of hours later I was trying to track down some senators for Josh, and feeling the effects of the emotional night and lack of sleep starting to wear on me. I rubbed my eyes tiredly. The phone rang, and I answered it automatically. "Josh Lyman's office."

"Donna, it's Sam."

The sound of my old friend's voice revived me, at least a little. For a moment I forgot about the crisis, and shared some good news with a friend. "Sam! How are you? Oh, I should tell you: Andi had the babies. A boy and a girl."

I could practically hear Sam's grin over the phone. "That's great news! What are their names?"

"Huck and Molly."

"Wow. I should call Toby. He must be… well, he's probably dealing with about fifty different emotions right now, isn't he?" I could hear how much he cared about his old boss. Sam changed the subject. "How's Josh doing?"

I sighed. "He blames himself for Zoey's kidnapping."

Sam echoed my sigh. He knew Josh almost as well as I did. "Of course he does. That's his curse."

I nodded, even though Sam couldn't see me. "There's nothing he can do, so he's locked into political bulldog mode."

"And how are you holding up?" Sam asked kindly. He always asked about me when he called for Josh.

"I'm in love with him," I blurted out. Immediately, my hand flew to my mouth.

Understandably, it took Sam a moment to respond. "Wow. When did this happen?" he asked, even though he probably knew better than I did.

"I'm not sure. Since Rosslyn, maybe even before, but I just realized it tonight. This is the first time I've said it out loud." I played it back in my head. I'm in love with Josh. It made me slightly dizzy.

Sam said sincerely, "That's great, Donna."

"Really?"

"Really."

That was a relief to me. I hadn't had much time to think about whether it was a positive or negative that I was in love with my boss, or what it might mean for me in the future. I didn't even know how Josh felt. I needed to process this, later, when I had time.

"I'll put you through to Josh now," I said.

"Ok, take care of yourself, Donna."

"You too, Sam." I transferred the call to Josh's office, and sat for a while, weighing the pros and cons of being in love with my boss.

WWWWWWWW

"You look awful," I said when Josh came out of his office a few minutes later when he had finished his phone call with Sam. Actually he looked great. He looked terribly tired, but his sleeves were rolled up, his tie was loose, and he looked great.

"Huh?" Josh yawned widely, and looked at me dazedly. "Did you say something?"

"I said you look awful."

"Gee, thanks, Donna," he said wryly. "You always know just what to say."

I ignored him. "You should go downstairs to the basement room and nap of the couch for a couple of hours," I suggested. "I'll come get you if anything happens."

He shook his head. "I really can't. Leo wants me to…"

"Josh," I interrupted firmly. "Someone around here needs to be rested enough to form a coherent sentence and, you know, actually run the country. You know that Leo is not going to sleep, and Toby certainly isn't going to get any rest with two newborns. That person has to be you, Josh. Go downstairs and take a nap." Josh reached into his pocket and popped a Lifesaver candy into his mouth, an action which was not lost on me. "I'll make you a deal. You can go downstairs and sleep for a few hours, or you can call Stanley," I said quietly.

Josh sucked on the Lifesaver thoughtfully. "Ok," he said finally. "I'll sleep for a couple of hours if it will make you happy."

"Yes, it will. Thank you."

Josh reached between us, and squeezed my hand, much as he had done during the press conference. "Thank you for being so great through all of this. I couldn't have held it together for this long without you."

"I'm sorry I was snarky to you before, about the faxes," I said, giving his hand a light squeeze.

"Don't worry about it. It's a stressful night," Josh said dismissively.

"Still, I shouldn't have taken my stress out on you."

"I'll be downstairs. Get me in two hours."

"Three."

"Two and a half."

"Fine," he agreed with a sigh. He turned to go. "And Donna?" he said just as he reached the door. "I want you to be able to take your stress out on me." He shrugged. "That's what friends are for."

I smiled softly. "Yeah, that's what friends are for."

WWWWWWWW

With Josh downstairs napping, I kept busy by typing up some reports that had been piling up. Very little governing was going to get done until the Zoey situation was resolved, I knew, but I wanted to be prepared. Besides, if I didn't keep my mind occupied I would go crazy.

"Donna, where's Josh?"

I felt the hairs on the back of my neck stand up, and I stiffened at the sound of her voice, but I stopped typing, pasted on a smile, and put my drama minor to good use. "What can I do for you, Amy?" I asked as sweetly as I could manage.

"Where's Josh?"

"He's sleeping. Is there something I can help you with?"

"He'll want to see me," Amy said confidently. "Where is he?"

I could see that she was trying to push my buttons, but I gritted by teeth, determined not to let her get to me. I shook my head. "I won't tell you where he is. He needs to get some sleep, and I won't wake him up for anyone except Leo or President Bartlet." I didn't think Amy knew of the existence of the Sagittarius room, and I wasn't about to clue her in.

Amy glared at me. I ignored her, and turned back to my typing. "You don't have to protect him, you know. He's a big boy. He can take care of himself," she said acidly. My hands stilled above the keyboard, but I didn't look up. "Our conversation got interrupted earlier, but your answer's pretty obvious," she continued. "You can keep on pretending; collecting his files for him, and fetching his dry cleaning to be close to him. You may think you 'get' Josh, but you'll never be more than his assistant." She paused to let that thought sink in. "Tell Josh to call me when he wakes up."

I didn't look up from my keyboard until I heard the click of Amy's heels fade down the hall. Then, I took a shaky breath, and quickly brushed the tears out of my eyes. Maybe she was right. Maybe Josh would never see me as more than his assistant. I was foolish and naïve to hope that something would happen between us. It was pathetic; like a high-schooler with a crush on her history teacher.

"Donna?" Toby approached my desk from the communications bullpen. I quickly brushed tears out of my eyes.

"What can I do for you, Toby? If you're looking for Josh, he's taking a nap. I want to give him at least another hour," I told him, trying to make my voice sound normal.

Toby nodded. "Well, when he wakes up, will you tell him I need to talk to him?" He turned to go, and then turned back to me. "Have you been crying?" he asked kindly.

I sniffed, wiped at my eyes, and tried to regain my composure. "I'm ok. It's just been a stressful day." I had always liked Toby. Despite his gruff exterior, we got along very well. He was the one who first told me about the President's M.S., and we had developed a sort of bond after that. I gave him a shaky smile to show him that I was truly not losing it. "I'll tell Josh to find you when he wakes up."

"Ok," Toby said after a moment. He gave my shoulder a squeeze, and then walked back to his office.

WWWWWWWW

"Josh," I knocked softly on his door several hours later. "Is there any news on Zoey?"

He shook his head, looking more discouraged than ever. "You can go home if you want, get some sleep." He yawned, and rubbed his eyes tiredly. The power nap obviously wasn't enough.

"Maybe you should go home," I suggested, stepping fully into the office. "You've been here for nearly twenty-four hours. You should sleep, or at the very least take a shower."

Josh shook his head, and pointed to the stack of files on his desk. "I have to work. We still don't have a vice president."

I perched on the end of his desk. "Finding a VP won't bring Zoey back any faster," I said quietly.

Josh turned to face me. "How do you do that? How do you always know exactly what I'm thinking?" I shrugged. "You just… get me."

Hearing him say that was like a balm on my injured soul after what Amy had said to me earlier. I felt vindicated. "Well, you're not going to find one now. My mother always says that nothing good happens after midnight. You can start fresh in the morning."

Josh smirked. "Your mother said that? Young Donnatella missed her curfew a lot, did she?" I rolled my eyes, and started to collect his coat and pack up his bag. "Donna," he said softly, so softly that I almost didn't hear him.

"Are you out of Lifesavers?" I asked without looking up from my task. "I'll pick some up on my way home. That drug store on my block is open twenty-four hours. They'll have them. Do you need anything else? Asprin? How are your prescriptions? You'll probably need a refill on your blood pressure medication soon."

"Donna," Josh said again, and he caught my wrist, stilling my flurry of packing. This time I looked up. He was staring at me with an expression I had only seen on his face twice before: once last January when he picked me up for the Inaugural Balls, and once two years ago on another late night in his office when I told him I wouldn't stop for red lights.

My pulse quickened, and I blushed under his intense gaze. "What?" I whispered.

He pulled me closer, and leaned in. I saw it coming, but it still caught me by surprise when his lips met mine. My eyes fluttered closed. All the electricity I felt when we bantered, or when his hand touched the small of my back when we walked through the halls was concentrated at that one point. My lips were on fire. We were completely in sync, as we had always been. It was over almost as soon as it began, and we stood there for a moment in each other's personal space, which we had always shared anyway.

Before either of us could say anything, Josh's phone rang. We both jumped, startled by the sudden intrusion into our private bubble. I cleared my throat, and answered it. "Josh Lyman." Josh took a couple of steps away from me. It felt like miles.

"Leo needs you in the Oval Office," I told him.

"No rest for the weary," he said quietly.

"I guess not."

"This might take a couple of hours. You should get some sleep. Use the basement room. I'll find you when I'm done in the Oval."

"Ok," I agreed. Josh still hesitated. "Go, Leo's waiting," I prompted. Whatever had just happened between us, this was still the White House, and we still had jobs to do. He nodded, glanced back at me one more time, and then left.

WWWWWWWW

I went downstairs to the Sagittarius room and tried to sleep on the couch, but my mind wouldn't shut off. Between admitting my feelings for my boss, and kissing him for the first time in a matter of hours, I had a lot to think about. I kept replaying the kiss over and over in my mind. Whatever I had imagined it would be like to finally kiss Josh, the reality surpassed my wildest fantasies. I replayed the feel of his surprisingly soft lips on mine, the gentle pressure of his hand on my waist, how he tasted like Lifesavers. It was perfect.

But I knew it didn't mean anything. We were both scared and stressed out, and needed a release. This was still the White House, and he was still my boss, and Zoey was still missing. Nothing would ever come of it, and it would never happen again. The best thing to do would be to put it out of my mind, and forget it ever happened. But that was easier said than done. So, I just replayed it over again, and cried myself to sleep.

To be continued...


	3. Chapter 3

  
Author's notes: The third, and final chapter. I hope you enjoy it! Please leave me feedback  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters. I just found them where Aaron Sorkin left them.  


* * *

Twenty-two hours later, the FBI found Zoey in the back of a van trying to cross the border from Maine into Canada. Her kidnappers were a couple of Islamic extremists with ties to the missing Bahji sleepers in New York. She had been missing for a total of seventy-two hours.

"We are deeply grateful for our youngest daughter's safe return. Now with a deeper appreciation for those we care about, more conscious of the transient nature of life, and more committed than ever to our responsibilities, we return to business as usual," President Bartlet said in his address to the nation upon Zoey's return. So, Zoey was returned safely to her parents, President Bartlet returned to the Oval Office, and things started to return to normal in the West Wing.

But things felt anything but normal to me. My whole world had shifted on its axis when Josh kissed me, and not in a good way.

WWWWWWWW

"Here's your schedule, and you have messages from about a dozen members of Congress who want to know when you're going to name your Vice Presidential nominee, and, no doubt, want to toss their name in the ring," I said, stepping into Josh's office the morning after Zoey was found.

"No doubt. Donna, listen... about what happened the other night," Josh began.

I held up my hand to stop him. "Don't worry about it, Josh. Let's just forget it ever happened." I didn't want to hear his explanations, or excuses, or all the reasons why it would never work between us. I knew all of them anyway, and I didn't think my heart could handle it.

"Are you sure?" he asked.

"Yes, I'm sure. Let's just forget about it. Business as usual, ok?" I repeated when President Bartlet had told the nation.

Josh looked skeptical, but he nodded his agreement. "Ok. I'll return these, pass this one on to Leo, and toss these," he said, sorting the message slips into three piles. I nodded, and went back to my desk. Business as usual.

WWWWWWWW

Two days later, Josh arrived at work just a couple of minutes before senior staff, which was very late for him. He tossed his stuff in his office, and then hustled down the hall toward Leo's office. I followed him so I could give him his schedule and messages.

Usually when we walked through the halls, we walked side by side, with our arms occasionally brushing against each other. The crowded, fast-paced atmosphere of the West Wing made this a necessity; otherwise we would get so jostled that we'd never be able to hold a conversation. But, this morning there were several inches between us. It felt like a chasm.

"You have a meeting with Senator Stark on the Hill at nine-thirty, and Tripp and O'Brien left messages about 289." I paused. "Late night?"

Naturally, my first thought when he showed up late was that he spent the night with Amy, but he wasn't wearing the same suit as yesterday, so I wasn't sure. I was fishing for information. Not that I had any claim on him, of course. I had released him from any obligations to me when I told him to just forget about the kiss. He was free to date any woman he wanted. I just really didn't want that woman to be Amy.

"I overslept," Josh said distractedly. "Do you have the VP vetting file?"

I handed him the file, and as he took it, his fingers brushed against mine ever so slightly. We both jumped at the contact, and pulled our hands away so quickly that we dropped the file. Papers scattered to the floor in front of Leo's office.

"Sorry," we bother muttered as we bent to pick up the pages.

"Josh," I said quietly, "are you having nightmares again? Is that why you overslept?"

He looked up and met my eyes for the first time all morning; for the first time in days, in fact. "No, that's not why, Donna. I promise." There was something in his voice that I couldn't identify. But I believed him, and felt a little better, even though his answer only increased the probability that Amy was the one keeping him up at night.

I handed the file back to him. "I'll see you when you get back from the Hill." He nodded, and stepped into Leo's office while I walked back to my desk feeling worse than before.

WWWWWWWW

"Donna, does Josh have a free minute? Donna?" CJ's gentle tap on my shoulder startled me out of my thoughts. I'd been replaying the kiss in my mind. Again. You would think it would get old, imagining it every night before I went to sleep, and at various other times during the day, but it never did. It was always as fresh and spine-tingling as the first time.

"I'm sorry, CJ, did you say something?"

"I asked you if Josh had some free time right now." She regarded me critically. "What's going on around here? Josh has been zoning out during Senior Staff, and now you're staring off into space."

I shrugged, and laughed nervously. "Just tired, I guess. It's been an emotional week."

CJ nodded in agreement. "So, he's free?"

"Yeah, he has a few minutes." CJ went into Josh's office, and I tried to concentrate on the research I was supposed to be doing.

WWWWWWWW

Things continued like that for the next couple of weeks. We did our jobs, same as we always had, but our rhythm was gone. We were off-kilter. We were always separated by a space of at least a couple of inches when we walked down the halls, and Josh never rested his hand on the small of my back anymore. Our banter was forced, and we never, ever mentioned the kiss again. I never imagined that kissing Josh would ruin our relationship, but I guess that's why they always say that office romance was a bad idea. I was miserable.

"Donna!" Josh shouted one afternoon about two weeks after Zoey was found. "Where's the file for the Mexico meeting?"

I walked around his desk, and located the missing folder under a stack of papers, briefing books, and a few takeout containers.

"Thanks," Josh said a little sheepishly.

"Do you need anything else? Josh?" I prompted when he didn't respond right away. He shook his head, and I started to leave, but Josh was standing next to his desk, blocking my path. I scooted to the right to go around him, but Josh expected me to go in the other direction, and ended up in my way again.

"Sorry," he muttered, and moved back to his right. I didn't anticipate this move, and shift to my left again. We laughed uncomfortably.

"Ok, you go that way, I'll go this way," I said to put an end to the awkward dance we were doing. I took his arms and moved him back to his left.

Ignoring the feeling of his biceps through his dress shirt, and the feel of his breath on my ear as I skirted past him, I left the office.

WWWWWWWW

Later that evening, Amy sauntered past my desk, and went straight into Josh's office without knocking. I had denied her access to him so often that she didn't even bother to ask my permission anymore. I noticed, however, that her top was just a bit too revealing to be considered appropriate for work. She was in Josh's office with the door closed for about half an hour. I couldn't hear anything, and I tried not to imagine all of the horrible things that could be happening inside.

Finally, Amy stormed out of josh's office, and slammed the door with such force that the framed picture on the wall next to it crashed to the floor. I felt a small thrill of victory. Obviously, whatever Amy had proposed, Josh hadn't been interested.

WWWWWWWW

Everyone in the West Wing had started marking time in terms of the kidnapping. Three days after the kidnapping. Two weeks. A month. In my head, I marked the time since Josh kissed me. Six weeks after the kiss was the Fourth of July, which was normally my favorite holiday. Late that evening, the bullpen was dark and quiet, the only light coming from my computer monitor. Everyone else was outside watching the fireworks. I wasn't really in the mood to watch and pretend to be happy.

I heard footsteps, and knew it was him even before he appeared. "Hey," he leaned against the glass partition of my cubicle with his hands in his pockets. "Why aren't you outside? You love fireworks."

I shrugged. "I just don't feel like celebrating," I said quietly. Because being close to you breaks my heart, I added mentally.

"Yeah. Listen, Donna," Josh paused and looked around the bullpen. "Hang on. I don't want to do this here." He took my arm, and led me to the Roosevelt Room, where we stood on opposite sides of the table.

"What are we doing in here?" I asked, looking around, genuinely confused. Josh was acting strange, even for him.

"I want to be very clear that what I'm about to say I'm not saying as your boss," Josh said. His tone softened. "Donna, I can't forget about the kiss, and I don't think I want to. Screw politics, screw the press. I'm tired of pretending that I don't feel something for you. I'm tired of letting my job dictate my personal life, and I'm tired of waiting. When you find something like what I think we have, you have to seize it, because you never know what's going to happen tomorrow. I think we've both been through enough to know that." He paused briefly. "So, I want to give us a shot."

My heart felt lighter with each word of his speech. I realized that this was exactly what I had been dying to hear him say every since the kiss, but I never dared to imagine that he felt this way, so I tried to be brave and ignore it. "You seem pretty certain," I said, judging his commitment. I was giving him another chance to back out, to stuff his declarations back in a box, and shut the lid tightly.

"I've never been more certain of anything."

If my heart felt light before, it was positively weightless now, like floating in zero gravity. I smiled. "Me too."

"Good." Josh broke out in a huge, dimpled grin, and crossed to my side of the table. "You know," he continued, "everyone is outside watching the fireworks." His hands found their way to my waist.

"That's true." I grinned too, my hands moving to tangle in the curls at the base of his neck that I had always wanted to touch.

"We're completely alone," Josh whispered, leaning his forehead against mine.

I smiled up at him. "How convenient."

I didn't think it was possible, but our second kiss was even better than the first. This time we both knew how we felt about each other, and why we were kissing. There was none of the hesitation of the first time. While the first kiss, though amazing, was short and sweet, this time our lips were slow, purposeful, and quickly became more passionate.

When we pulled apart a couple of minutes later to catch our breath, I rested my forehead against Josh's. "Wow," I panted, suddenly rather inarticulate.

"How's that for fireworks?" Josh smirked.

He wanted fireworks? I just leaned up, and captured his smirking lips in another mind-numbing kiss. I would show him fireworks.

The End.


End file.
